Here We Go Again

I’d like to assert that the best part of Saw VI

came roughly fifteen minutes after the start. Simone chops off her arm to get out of her Jigsaw trap and lands herself in the hospital. When asked if she learned anything she proceeds to yell that she did not learn anything and demands that her brand new arm nub be considered. She does this while pointing with said nub. Now you can say that I have a sick sense of humor (and you wouldn’t be wrong) but I laughed my ass off. And I was in good company as Shady was also giggling (I sometimes think I’m a bad influence on him, he’s really a nice guy). Just something about an accusing nub tickles my funny bone.

And that was about it for me.

I’ve sat through the past few Saw movies hoping but not really expecting anything. I sometimes feel like a half-ass believer at church. Sure I want something good but I’m really only going out of habit.

Everyone is aware of the groundbreaking, shocking, goodness of the original Saw movie. When Tobin Bell slams the door shut at the end and pronounces “GAME OVER” I was gasping “holy fuck he was alive the whole time!” right along with everyone else. The following sequels had no real way to match that one gut shot of a moment. Instead, viewers were giving every kind of torture device imaginable and a ton of blood. And that was ok for a sequel or two. But now were on number six and its worn waaaay too thin. Even the traps themselves seem like repeats. With the exception of the (not so) merry-go-round, I wasn’t even impressed with the ingenuity there.

Also along the ride, I got behind Jigsaw. Admittedly, I have issues, but I saw the logic in his appreciate life of I’ll off you method. Fine, teach people a bloody gruesome lesson. But Hoffman, on the other hand, is a douche bag. He’s an arrogant, annoying, and worst of all typical, psycho. He’s getting off on offing people just like so many other psycho thriller villains. The biggest disappointment was that his head wasn’t demolished by the reverse bear-trap.

The worst part about this series is that I will continue to watch them. Sigh. Shady and I are beginning to think that we’ll be meeting at the theater right around Halloween for the next ten years for these damn things. If nothing else just to see how much worse it can get.